A few weeks ago I went with my sister and a friend to knock out all my Christmas shopping in one day. Last year I only bought a few nice thins, but let me tell you why we aren’t doing a minimalist Christmas this year.
I have had a lot of requests this year for minimalist, simple living friendly, gifts for kids. I hate to disappoint but you all, but I actually did things quite a bit differently this year. Normally, I would be your go-to gal for how to get as few toys as possible for your kids, but I literally did a 180 on my gift-giving strategy.
Now, you all know I love to keep our house clutter free and minimal. With five kids running around, it’s a lot easier to keep an orderly home when there aren’t unused possessions stuffed inside every open drawer, cabinet and basket.
In our home, we have a couple sets of built-ins that have almost nothing stored in them. On the shelves, the baskets remain mostly empty. I just figure if something is used so infrequently that we store it away, chances are good we will never actually need the item at all.
I like to keep clutter to a bare minimum, so no one in our family has to spend extra minutes of our lives cleaning up stuff we don’t use.
With all that being said, I did a thing this year. I went out and spent all the allotted Christmas money for our children on the cheapest and largest toys possible.
Whaaa?? Are you even Lisa talking right now?! Who hijacked your blog and wrote this blasphemous post?
Ok, give me a minute to explain myself. 
I’m blaming this on Marie Kondo
I’m blaming this on Marie KondoDid you read Marie Kondo’s book, the Life changing Magic of Tidying Up? The basic premise of the book is that you should only keep things in your home that spark joy. There is more to it than that, and it really is quite life changing. You wouldn’t believe how much of your life is devoted to organizing, recategorizing and stressing over the things in your life that actually add nothing to it.
There is a section in the book where she goes into what to do with gifts you were given that are just no longer relevant to your life. Usually in this scenario, people feel guilty for discarding something that was given to them by a loved one. She addresses this guilt and offers a very practical solution.
Basically, the item in question served its purpose the moment the joy was felt by the giver or receiver of the gift.
So say, for example, your grandma gave you a sweater you don’t love very much. When you opened that gift, I bet you smiled. I bet your grandma felt really great about making you happy. That right there was the moment that item served its purpose. That moment of joy shared by you and your grandma.
If later you decide that sweater doesn’t fit quite right, and it is just taking up space in your cluttered dresser, it is quite ok to let it go. Donate it to someone in need. It has served its purpose.
What does this have to do with kids on Christmas?
For kids, Christmas morning is just about the most exciting day of the year. I remember being a kid and it felt simply magical. My mom used to wrap all the presents several days before Christmas and have them sitting under the tree. My sisters and I would sort them in biggest to smallest, shake them and line them up in the order which we would open them.
The anticipation was the best part.
This year I decided to think of the gifts as an experience of joy to give to the kiddos. So what if they’re cheap and bulky. When they tire of them in a few months, I can bring them up to the local Goodwill.
They already served their purpose Christmas morning in the joy they brought and the memories they will create.
The story of last year when I ruined my kids christmas
This whole strategy change stemmed from a sad day Christmas Eve last year. We were at my grandma’s house, where there are 15 kids 10 and under. It is madness when the presents come out.
Well, in my usual minimalist-mom fashion I decided to pool the kids money together and get them a few nice things instead of a bunch of junk. As the other kids were all playing with there dolls, dinosaurs, puzzles and trains, my five year asked me when he could open his next present.
It made me so sad, because I had nothing else for him to open. His little mind couldn’t compute the logical like mine could. Hey kid, we will be going to another Christmas party tomorrow where you’ll get a few more things. You already have other toys at home. There are kids all over the world who would love to just get one present. Why are you so ungrateful?
Someday kids will be mature enough to understand that life is more than big presents, and that there are people in the world who are less fortunate. Someday will come soon enough.
For now, ten dollar store gifts mean more to him than one nice book.
Ok, I didn’t actually ruin their Christmas last year, but I did realize something. The magic of Christmas for kids is in the frivolous and fun. If the wrapped box is huge, they have a blast unwrapping it. It doesn’t matter to them that they will probably forget that toy exists in less than two weeks.
The item served its purpose right there on Christmas morning. In a few weeks/months, when the kids have forgotten the items, I can haul them off to Goodwill for someone else to enjoy.
Don’t hold me to this
I may change my strategy again next year, but for right now in this season, this is where ma few of my kids are. I want to create happy memories and traditions, and keep the magic in this special season.
How do you handle Christmas with your kids? Let me know in the comments below!
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Louise says
I love buying gifts for my kids for Christmas. They don’t get a lot of gifts from extended family so it’s not like they receive a huge amount of stuff. Each gift I buy my kids (I have 6, now aged 8-21) is carefully thought about, something that child wants or needs. Presents which add to a collection are ideal in a large family (duplo, little people, train set, lego, tea set/kitchen/play food, Sylvanian families – think these are calico critters in the states, art supplies etc). It is very rare that my kids tire of any of their toys after a few weeks (unless they are super-junky stuff that breaks) so I try to purchase quality which will last.
Shelly says
I am so happy for your children! They will have wonderful memories of this Christmas!
Merry Christmas!
Monique says
I really enjoyed this perspective. I love keeping things simple and I’m Constantly purging and not wanting to bring in more and more junk. But there sure is something special about the joy it brings to both you and your kids when you watch them unwrapping presents. ?
Nicole says
Thank you so much for this post! I grew up having large Christmas mornings and love giving them to my boys now. I tried the minimal Christmas and it was a sad day for us as well. Bravo for being real with us in this harsh, judgmental online world.
Julie says
Way to be real, Lisa! As a mom of nine kids, and now 8 grands I LOVE gift giving and the fun of Christmas morning. My two grown sons who are married with families still love coming home for Christmas with the family because it is so fun. And it isn’t just the gifts…it is the pure joy and delight of the celebrated birth of Christ! Shouldn’t that just make us want to celebrate and give gifts abundantly? Thank you for sharing the real!
Mom says
Hi I truly appreciate your decision. In my home am the one who thinks before spending. I believe that money saved is money earned. I do spend, but on useful items which have some purpose. Though most of the times my decisions are right, but, still sometimes I feel guilty of being in the way of others happiness. You are right, we shouldn’t impose our ideas on to others esp children. Let them grow up to make their own decisions. This is true maturity on your part. It’s so important to let go sometimes. Have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays with your family and friends.???
Sally says
Lisa, I love this. And this pragmatism is why I love you. Don’t let your principles get in the way of your kids’ joy. I have friends who have a no plastic rule and all their kids want more than anything in the world is flashing lights and remote controlled cars. Give them the magic and the joy – they’re only small once. <3
Emily says
Lovely post! I have not read Marie Kondo’s book but I appreciated what you shared about the purpose of the gift and when that purpose is fulfilled. It may just be at the time of giving. Good to remember! I love giving gifts to my children and tend to purchase items that go with a larger set (duplos, Legos) or that can be part of our toy rotation. Love that you mentioned a budget too. So important!! 🙂
Mary Green says
Yes, if we are doing Christmas gifts and Santa as PART of our celebrations, we need to have MAGIC! Life will give us many challenges so to have that as part of our story is precious.
Sharon J says
Good for you! Younger kids don’t understand the less is more at Christmas…ha ha! As you know its the morning of Christmas that is the most important to the kids. It will probably be one they talk about for years to come! Creating memories is what you are doing.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year in your new home.
Ashley says
This is such a great perspective! I’ve never thought of the minimalist / Marie Kondo style of purging with the view that maybe something’s usefulness could have happened already. I’ve been getting annoyed at the cheap clutter my child has been gifted with by doting relatives. Instead of worrying what they’ll think if I get rid of their gifts, or that my child will become attached to junk I wouldn’t have bought for them myself, I’m going to frame it as a moment to capture the joy they have in giving to him and watching/imagining him enjoy it. Then when that usefulness is over, the item can move on to bring others joy. After all, I love picking out and giving gifts, I should let them have the same experience without judgment. I’m so glad I read this before Christmas! Thanks Lisa!
Leann says
Thank you so much for sharing this Lisa! I am constantly trying to cut through the clutter, but I love seeing the joy on the kids’ faces Christmas morning. 🙂 This was just what I needed!
Darlene Laursen says
I’m so happy to hear you think this through. Sometimes, we just go with what the popular thought is and don’t really apply it to our lives. You thought this through. I don’t have the pleasure of having children but I do give to many children. I have to admit that I’ve bought the one big thing only to forget the little pleasures that the smaller things give. Thank YOU for reminding me. Thank YOU for sharing!!! Merry Christmas!
Lisa says
Thank you so much Darlene. Merry Christmas to you also!
Kim says
I bet they will remember this Christmas. 🙂 We do something they “want, need, wear, read” for our kids. Have for about 5 years now. It has worked out really well. Since we have 6 kids it ends up being quite a few presents overall but with a one in, one out rule it keeps their clutter to a minimum. They are pretty willing to get rid of old toys when they just got new ones. Love your blog/channel. So inspiring. 🙂
Lisa says
I think that is a great idea. Four presents still give kids something to look forward to!
Kira says
I love this idea! It’s so exciting for anyone to get presents on Christmas day.
What I plan on doing next within the next two christmases is, having my child pick out 2-3 toys they don’t mind giving up to so they can get 2-3 presents to replace those toys. They will probably get more gifts then that, I’m just hoping it keeps the clutter down.
Lisa says
Yes that is such a great idea! They forget about the old ones anyway, at least mine do!
Denise says
Thanks to everyone who agrees with Lisa. I think the same way and I hope my daughter does also because I bought my granddaughter 5 gifts. We agreed on one. We will see on the 25th.
Karolyn Love says
I agree, Lisa! The joy you get to see on their faces when they see and then open those presents is pure JOY for us as parents and grandparents!! And they are only small for such a short time and Christmas’s will always be their memories which you get to hear them tell and re-tell for years to come!! Have a wonderful Christmas and God Bless you and yours throughout the coming year…
Lisa says
Thank you so much, Karolyn! Hope you all had a very Merry Christmas!
Tiffany says
Hi,
Mom of 6 with baby on the way…
I only buy what we can afford to give our kids without going into debt. (They do get presents, but not extravagance)
My husband and I don’t give each other gifts (we know we love each other) and that helps stretch the budget. We try to do special things all year and that cuts down on “Christmas Pressure.” We make sure our kids help make things for the neighbors, each other, etc.
They love the experiences we create like looking at lights far more than fleeting package excitement. Just want a voice for families that cannot afford extravagance… time and love are the very best presents you can give your kids! Moderation is not deprivation!! (Note that we would have to come after all that package opening because I would never want them to feel the weight of comparison). My kids are literally the happiest kids I know.
Everyone is free to experience Christmas in their own way, but I am proud of what we are able to do as a family.
Lisa says
I should have clarified that we still spent less than $100 on each kid. Definitely no extravagance here, and NO debt! I just meant more large cheap things for the younger kinds, instead of one experience item like I did in the past.
Tiffany says
I’m really glad you all are able to do that! You are obviously a great mom, Lisa!
We spent less than $100 total on 6 kids. The girls got Calico Critter houses/furniture they made with my husband from wood, and some other stuff.. The boys got a wooden garage with cars and a racetrack.
We baked and decorated sugar cookies, made homemade manicotti, and did a “lights display scavenger hunt” of sorts.
In the future we will spend more : )
but my heart knows we are raising happy kids now.
Lisa says
Those all sound like lovely gifts! No reason to spend a ton!!
Susan M Robinson says
I have 5 kids as well and when they were little, we always made sure gifts came out equal, meaning if one child had 6 gifts total ALL children had 6 gifts total. It wasn’t about what the gift was because with 5 kiddos, they will range in age and age appropriate wants and requests. This year, we now have 6 kiddos to buy gifts for (ages 16, 18, 20, 22, 24 and 26…..we picked up an extra son when my daughter got married…..insert smile and heart shape). We have, for the last few years followed this rule of thumb when gifting. Each person comes up with two items under these categories: Something You Want:, Something You Need:, Something You Wear:, Something You Read:. The lists are usually made right after Thanksgiving and we (my husband and I) buy 1 item from each category for each person, therefore, each person receives four gifts. The reason for including 2 items under each category is that we may not be able to find one item, so the other is a back up plan. There is no price limit, although, no one has asked for any one item that exceeds $80.00. Sorry, we do not do minimalism at all during Christmas, but we do not do debt either.
Lisa says
That sounds like a very smart way to do it!
Suzanne says
About kids and Christmas gifts…my take has always been “the Baby Jesus received a gift from each of three Wise Men”. Three prettily wrapped gifts is enough for any child to rip open at Christmas (in addition to lots of little goodies in a stocking). They should have toys to play with and break. Toys stimulate imagination and help children learn to socialize with one another. They just don’t need so many that mom and dad have to go into debt to provide them.
I’m a post-WWII baby and my parents had very little money when I was small. My brother, sister and I had a few gifts each but never felt deprived because each gift was chosen with love from the best parents ever.
I admire your thrift and that you put love of one another before things.
May God always bless you with health and happiness.
Valerie says
Something we could all consider in this idea for the little ones cheaper toys is buying used or donated/thrifted toys instead. Especially if we’re going to “take it to the local Goodwill” in a few months, might as well recycle so it speak. I do buy new for extended family because I think they might feel weird about a used (not new in box) gift, but my 3 and 5 year olds don’t care if it came from Target or Goodwill, etc., it’s the exact same plastic anyway, I just wipe them off well with soap and water or add fresh batteries, etc. I just wanted to include the thought, love your style and blog, God bless!
Lisa says
Smart!
Adrienne says
I love this! When we were kids we didn’t have a ton of presents, but I remember how much we just enjoyed the traditions of the season, one of which was to sit in a circle and open presents one at a time (oldest to youngest or vice versa). We would all ooh and aah over each present and have a blast. I think it was a way my parent’s chose to make it last longer, even when we each only had a few things. But we totally loved it! I love the perspective of choosing what’s right for your family in the season that you’re at, even if that might be different that what you did last year or what people are expecting. It’s good to give ourselves grace, especially at Christmas 🙂
Kristy says
While that is a great thought, bringing joy to kids, it’s also good to teach them early on about saving the environment by reducing consumerism.
Buying cheap plastic toys are even worse for our earth rather than buying well thought gifts that have purposes (if they are into music or sports or arts).
So before recycling, think about refusing in the first place. That way your minimalist lifestyle meets with zero-waste goals. Hope this year you’ll have a better tradition..merry christmas.
Connie Martin says
I love the simple Christmas tree with just bows. What type of material did you use and what is the best way to tie them on…do you tie on branch or make the bow and use a hook?
Carol says
Just wondering what the Christmas gift plans are for this year? We have always done fewer but nicer gifts for each child. Grandma is finally on board! Two nice gifts per grandchild , and then she arranges some sort of game for dollar store prizes, my kids love it! I also wrap each item I put in their stocking so we can open those Christmas Eve, they opened Christmas pjs the day before Thanksgiving to wear them longer , and each child will receive two nice items from us to open Christmas Day. I feel like when they open loads of presents all at one time no one knows what to play with, they end up in a pile in the corner of their bedroom. We also decluttered the playroom the end of October and donated several bags of toys, and sold several sets and large items they have outgrown before people were knee deep into holiday shopping . We also sold winter coats and clothing that were outgrown. This became my gift money! I become easily stressed out over messes and clutter and it overwhelms a couple of my more sensitive kids, so this works well for us. We are not doing niece/nephew gifts this year either and I cut back on the number of cards I sent out ,due to needing to purchase a new vehicle, money is a little tight this year , but I don’t spend a lot even when the bank account is full. Less is more! The kids have never compared or complained ! We’ve always done it this way so it’s all they know .
Kristy says
While that is a great thought, bringing joy to kids, it’s also good to teach them early on about saving the environment by reducing consumerism.
Buying cheap plastic toys are even worse for our earth rather than buying well thought gifts that have purposes (if they are into music or sports or arts).
So before recycling, think about refusing in the first place. That way your minimalist lifestyle meets with zero-waste goals. Hope this year you’ll have a better tradition..merry christmas.